Friday, January 21, 2011

The Fine Line

Sometimes I like to live my life on the fine line between confidence and denial.  Some days I wake up and think, "Today, all my lights will be green.  Today, there will be no lines at the grocery store.  Today, every cute boy I meet will ask for my number.  Today, I can eat anything I want and it will have absolutely no effect on my figure whatsoever.  Today all my dreams will come true, just like every other day."  It's really not such a bad attitude for your life.

The other night I dropped my phone on the pavement.  I had been living my usual life philosophy: Today, my phone will never break no matter how many times I drop it on the hard, cold, unforgiving pavement.  The hundred times before that night, my philosophy was right.  Now my screen is cracked.  A far cry from a broken phone.  A very far cry from even a smashed unusuable screen.  In fact, it's more like a faint pen scratch, or a stray hair that will never blow off.  Regardless, I find it annoying.  Probably because every time I look at this particular fine line on my phone I am reminded of the fine line I choose to live by, and how sometimes it's hard to deny certain things.


If I'm driving home and I hit every light red but one, my denial kicks in and I think "I knew it, I knew I would get green lights today."  If a stream of gentlemen suitors are not begging for my attention but an old guy on the metro gives up his seat for me, I think "I knew it, I knew the men all loved me."  If my food turns out to have calories but I happen to look in the mirror, I think "I knew it, I knew that with just a couple more pounds I would be a stunning individual."

But I can't wipe/deny away this dang crack on my phone.  So I've come up with a plan.  I'm going to tell myself that every phone comes with a fine hairline crack.  That it's not only natural, but sought after.  I knew it, I knew I was cool enough to get one of those fine line phones.  I just knew all my dreams would come true today, just like every other day.  There, everything is back to normal.

2 comments:

Kim Woodruff said...

I love you. You're awesome.

Sarah said...

I love you. You're crazy.